I turned THIRTY this past weekend. And I’m not sad about it. I am gleefully waving my twenties goodbye. Not because they were bad because they certainly weren’t, but because I am so excited for the future.

Of course, the last decade has had its ups and downs – I suffered from a massive depression that started in my teens and lasted well into my 20’s which lead me down a road of anxiety, leaving my dream school, and gaining weight, but it also gave me my husband 2 weeks after leaving said dream school, the resolution and overcoming of said depression, my daughter, a brother in law, 1 niece and 3 nephews, 6 added siblings, 4 parental in-laws, the best friends I’ve ever had in my life, 5 years at a great company, and some great vacations!

Oh, and a 50-pound weight off my…. well, body!

Overall, a great decade if I do say so myself.

My mother has read me a book every birthday. Perhaps you’ve heard of it. Dr. Seuss’ Happy Birthday to You!. In our family, every birthday the book is quoted. “I wish I could do what they do in Katroo, they sure know how to say Happy Birthday To You!” (I could go on about snipping with snippers and nipping with nippers because I have the book practically memorized, but I won’t) ANYWAYS, as I head into this birthday, I realize that God has me currently living in my Katroo. Sure, there are things that could change, improve, but there is no one on Earth who doesn’t have something they would like to change. I am living in my Katroo because, more than any other year of my life, the “twilight of my twenties” (29) was the year that I really took over. It was the year I chose to live my life, not just be along for the ride. I overcame a lifetime of doubt and insecurity and laziness to motivate myself to change and become who I wanted to be.

My weight doesn’t define me, but it encourages me. The last 8 months of weight loss have shown me what my character really is.

Before and After
What a difference 8 months makes

I love to tell my dad that I hate the word persevere. As I struggled and scrambled to overcome my mighty depression, he would tell me often to persevere, and I would roll my eyes. When he would force me out for a walk and I would act (quite literally) like a 2-year-old mid-tantrum because I couldn’t control my head and heart, he would tell me to persevere. While I hated the word, it’s exactly what I did. He’s told me to do such a thing often since, for different reasons, and he continued to do so when I whined about that damn word. Since February, when I made the decision to finally change and lose weight, I don’t think I realized how difficult the road would be. Sure, I figured I would miss bread, but it’d be fine. I didn’t realize (silly, I know) that I would need to be making a conscious, loud, proud decision every single day when it came to food. That I’d need to tell others and share my journey, so they could help me along the way. That I would need to persevere.

But I did.

I stand (at my desk) here before you today more than 50 pounds lighter than I began my 29th year with. I am proud, confident, and excited about the future. For maybe the first time in my life, I am really digging my own body, and it’s making me really dig other parts about me too. I’ve changed and grown and morphed into a physically and mentally different person. I had no idea that weight loss could change more than my amount of fat. But it did! It changed my outlook on life, it encouraged me to take more risks and be bolder, to stand up for myself, to do things I previously thought impossible. Why? Because by losing the weight, I already proved to myself that I could do the impossible.

So here I am. Thirty and a brand-new Sam. Here’s to persevering and doing what they’d do in Katroo.

30th Brithday
Forgive the self-serving photos of myself. You only turn 30 once, right?

30th Birthday

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